Oui, oui Madame

More on the 35 symptoms of Menopause!

My personal favorite?  Number 14–Incontinence:  especially upon sneezing, laughing, urge incontinence.

 Did you know it is impossible to house-break a Pomeranian?

 Now, in my younger years, this would have sent me through the roof.  The stains on the carpet, the odor, the embarrassment and that’s just my incontinence.

 But, hello?  The dog only compounds the problem.   However, there is a silver lining. I can blame symptom 14 on the dog.   Nah.  Actually, I blame the people who came out of me.  I never used to have this problem when I laughed.  Or sneezed.  Or…or…you know, sky-dived.   Having babies will do that to you.  I have a friend who pushed so hard, she gave partial birth to her bladder. 

 Look, honey!  Twins!

When she was forty, my cousin had a baby.  She said, “At our house, we have one in diapers, one in Kotex and one in Depends.”

 I’m beginning to understand now, why older women like to keep those yappy little dogs around.  “Oh, come on in, but please, ignore those horrible stains on the floor.  I’ve got a Pomeranian.”

 Yeah.  Sure.




Filed under Marriage, Menopause, Motherhood

2 responses to “Oui, oui Madame

  1. OMG, Carolyn. I swear you should be doing stand up. (That’s comedy, by the way.) LOL

  2. Grace Bohannan

    Carolyn, I still wondering if poise pads, depends or just asking the kids to borrow a diaper is the way to go these days. Then I thought about a catheter and leg bag would be more efficient. But that would leave us gals only two choices of clothing, pant and long granny skirts. Oh my getting older sucks!! Have to run gotta go again. Gracie

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