One of the coolest things about being on Facebook is how popular it makes you feel. “Looky there, Pa! I got fifty thousand friends!” Just think how much loot you’d get, if you invited all of your ‘friends’ to like, your wedding. Or graduation. Or birthday party.
I especially cherish the friend requests from my ‘friends’ who sport names like Aboijalee Yazdonuthole Xilfred or, Ima Scarymanstalker. They always send sweet messages like: “I lik you pix and I think luv you friend.” Or, “Hey, I like your profile and plan to be in your town soon, maybe you could show me around? Heh, heh, heh, snort, heh.”
Shucks! Heck yeah! Come on over, my friend! After all, you saw my profile on Facebook and you lik to be my friend.
I find having so many friends a comfort. For example, should my husband get it in his head to say, cut off another one of his fingers…I could call on one of my ‘friends’ to come hold the fort down while I’m in the E.R. Take care of the kids. Bring a casserole. “Hey, Aboijalee Yazdonuthole Xilfred! C’mon over and help me clean the gutters this weekend? I’ll supply the beer and pizza!”
If I have inadvertently ever befriended you and you find me and my life to be something you don’t lik, by all means, un-friend me. Won’t hurt me a bit. After all, I’ll just make more. Hundreds of bosom buddies to show around when they are in my town from whatever planet they happen to hail from.
In the mean time, as Sweet Baby-James says, “You just call…out my name…and ya know, where ever I am…I’ll come runnin’ to see ya again… Winter, spring, summer or fall, all ya gotta do is call (or instant message me) and I’ll be there, yeah, yeah, yeah…
Cuz you gotta friend-on-Facebook.