THE GIRL WITH THE SEXUAL TATTOO—Part three in a jealous harangue

Had any "Drunken Chicken" lately?


Yeah, sure, probably another reason I’m not on the “LIST” (said with a snarky, envious, mocking tone) (besides being a non-cussing hack) (and ignorant of the proper uses of parentheses), is that I won’t do explicit or erotic sex…er…in books.  And let’s face it.  In order to break new ground in this arena, my hero would have to fall for a chicken.  Not natural.  And, as our reader(s) know(s), I don’t use offensive verbiage  (unless my hero is seriously threatened, and then only sparingly–see the DDH bomb in my last post). 

 Plus, if I stick to the old adage “write what you know” my love scenes would have to include sweat socks.  

 Whatever happened to the good old days of escapism?  Now all anyone seems to care about in their literature is realism.  Bah.  I get plenty of realism, just driving down the road.  (People really don’t seem to enjoy being cut off by a harried, menopausal mini-van driver and are very ‘real’ about expressing themselves).   

Wendy and I are always blathering about how we wish the entertainment world was still Frank Capra-land.  Mayberry.  Mitford.  And not constantly dripping with blood and demons and other such “realism”.  Excuse my French, but Fooie on realism.  I long for Lucy and Ethel.  For humor that’s not centered on the crotch for once.  For good guys who are not named Lucifer.  For a world where being a hero includes being there, staying there and taking the trash out to the can and not taking out trash, buying it a drink and having sex with it.  

 So.  To review.  Not on NYT Best-seller list because:   Won’t swear.  No explicit (or poultry inclusive) love scenes.  Find taking out the garbage erotic.   (And, of course, don’t understand proper parenthetical usage). 



Filed under Changing Genre's, Marriage, Menopause, Motherhood, Older writers, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, Writing

3 responses to “THE GIRL WITH THE SEXUAL TATTOO—Part three in a jealous harangue

  1. Shirley Karr

    Comic Elayne Boosler does a hilarious routine about a boyfriend who was a keeper because he not only took out the trash, he put a new bag in the can afterward. !!

    I feel your frustration. I ended my association with my last (and first, and only) publisher because I didn’t write hot, multiple sex scenes and sizzling sexual tension from page three. In today’s genre fiction market I feel disenfranchised as reader, not just a writer. Even the books that don’t have explicit sex and lust-driven plots are marketed that way so it’s tough to find stuff I want to read. Which may explain why I can practically recite Goodnight Moon…

  2. Debbie Douglas


    So as the baby librarian smirked at me as she checked out my arm load of Emile Loring ROMANCE novels, I felt almost embarrassed for a moment. However, with all the “realism”going on around me, it is nice to go to a world where manners are the norm, gentlemen always dress for dinner, and ladies GET to wear really lovely clothes. And what is wrong with that? Nothing, I say…when I want realism I will read the paper…but wait is that real? I don’t think so!

  3. Mr. Man

    If I am a fifty two year old man that married a woman after dating four weeks, working on thirty years of marriage, raised three kids, high school teacher, RN Nurse, and a Marine Sniper, and yes, I read your books, what’s to be said about me. The balance of romance and humor, good manners, faith, and commitment and respect, are what keeps your books on my shelf. Oh! I still open the door for my wife. Please, keep writing!

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