I got into a little scuffle with some of my dearest friends this past weekend, and I’d like us to publicly kiss and make up.
Here’s what happened: Next month Carolyn and I are heading to New York with our friends Su, Darla and Ginger. It’s going to be part business, part Thelma and Louise road trip sans most of the crime. Last Saturday four of us met to work out the details and to hit the mall to pick up essentials. The problem began at breakfast. I arrived with wild hair and the bare minimum of makeup (I’m working on embracing the real me, remember).
They arrived beautiful. I mean, just fabulous. Hair freshly cut and colored, their makeup perfect, not a damn line on any of their post-menopausal-yet-dewy faces. And it was only 8:30 in the morning. I feel so happy that they are aging beautifully. Really, I do. I mean, I love these women. But by the time my tea arrived, I was thinking about the ads I’ve been seeing for an Origins wrinkle eraser. You get 83% of the effect of the injectables I refuse to use because I’m so self-actualized.
So, off we go to the mall and there it is—the wrinkle eraser. A lovely 46-year-old (we asked) saleswoman with not a line on her kisser offers us samples. Tiny little samples. Well, looking at this saleswoman and at my friends, I begin to feel my self-actualization slipping southward. I mean, it’d be just as easy to embrace myself with 83% of my fine lines and wrinkles softened a little, right? So…
I took my tiny sample and my friends’ samples, too. They don’t need them.
They got so upset. They asked me if I’d let my daughter take her friends’ gifts. Well, yes, I would in a case like this. It would show discernment. And, she’d be saving them from putting unnecessary chemicals in their pores. But they grabbed their little packets back (rather forcefully, I’d say), and a brief physical skirmish in front of the Origins counter ensued. Our saleslady and two of her coworkers suggested we stop it.
We haven’t really discussed the incident since, but I’ve been mulling it over, and I think we should make up right here, right now.
So apologize, girls. And then gimme back my wrinkle erasers!!!!